Cat Care for Beginners

Book

Cat Care for Beginners by Alice Comb

Oh my Goddess! I absolutely love cats!

They are fluffy and cute and bouncy and have spangly eyes and cute wittle noses.

Contrary to ancient belief, Quillian cats love milk!

They like being stroked and can be tamed very well and will follow you around if they really, really like you.

They say cats can also sense the dead and see spirits. My little Stephen can. Stephen Pawkins I call him.

He is the cleverest cat and will HISS when ghosts are present. It scared me the other day when he hissed at the milk delivery man, who must have a ghost behind him, as Stephen hisses at that man every time he visits.

They say cats have another skill but sadly, not my cat. When he is not chasing fish being dragged around, he is either asleep or worrying the chickens.

That's all you need to know, so make sure you treat your cat well, or I will come around to your house with Mr Pawkins and not only will I be very very cross, but I will also beat the living **** out of you.