Bumper Book of Brotherly Chuckles

Book

A lady killed by her own clothes was a fashion victim.

Did you hear about the compost tycoon? He was filthy rich.

I keep a ruler in my pocket for good measure.

Scented candles get on my wick.

I found a missing limb at the foot of our stairs.

They say a good invisible man is hard to find.

I had a hobby horse. He loved board games, sewing and collecting butterflies.

The best quality gunpowder you can't hold a candle to.

I was going to open the world's smallest tavern. Well, that was my inn-tent.

Do tree-men have woodpeckers?

I gave my friend a boomerang as a gift with the message 'Many Happy Returns' on it.

Ground beef. Shredded pork. Sorry I am just mincing my words.

At the new pet protection home, there isn't room to swing a cat.

I dream of filled pastry in the clouds, but it is just pie in the sky.

A highwayman said, "stand and deliver", so I stood up and took my liver out.

I made a bird out of cowpats. It was a stool pigeon.

Are runner beans the best fast food?